seeyat

I am the same

Not lost to time

Still the same man in this game

Victim of a victimless crime

To be seen in the context of comfort

With time, nothing but the still beating heart of rhyme

I am here asking you not only who you see

The me you have grown to know living ferociously

The one to kindly calm and kindle flames

Our hearts devoured emotions with their ways

Still to myself never imagining to see

The ways I had heard to feel you

I am not here to steal you

These are things we see in the real you

Not an image or a statement

This is not a living question

We hear ourselves under the masks and faces

We hear our thoughts shine through though unspoken

Only known to the darkest of places

Awake and alive if ever unbroken

This blood awakened by the night

Coursing through veins once held by the cold

We return home if called by such a name

This is a fantasy turned to real life alive

Begging inside to be heard

Trembling messages of hope and dreams

I will exist beside you

With no expectation

Nothing denied you

I am here and reaching for the answer to my own

I will say once more that we roam

We will find our place

Within this spinning world we truly call home

I’m not a tough guy

I’ve seen it enough I

Can’t put up with speech

They’ll defend themselves all

Through the spring to the fall

The snow in the fields to the beach

Each one of them always

Comments and pathways

Statements just thrown to the wind

About sexual progress

To the sports they impress

Because that is the life they bask in

Where I quirk and I wiggle

Leading kind hearts to giggle

A core infrastructure of life

While I find it amazing

Some others find hazing

Called for joy overthrowing its strife

Some find it required

To add fuel to the fire

This seems all to be done in fear though

We should always take moments

From the grind and ignorance

Because life is too serious not to be a magnificent weirdo

She is Eons known

Decades heard

Seconds seen for her word

There is nothing shown

What love is become

For the patience of centuries forgotten

We are more now than ever before

Something seen and unsure

Others defy what is fact

This is not question

When what we know by memory

Is in fact

I have heard her name

Silence among the dead

Raging rivers seething

Without question I love her

Through grace and being

She is more than something

She is amazing

A heart among minds

Questioning trust thrust into light

Is she my everything as once was thought

Was there a greater bullet bought

Without doubt unforgotten

Her voice an echo begotten

Will I hear her again this way

Passing night into day

All time forgotten for the moment

With her lips do the oceans cease movement

She is pure unrelenting beauty

The one that confuses me

Through confusion diffuses me

A cure for what abuses me

Heroin to empty veins

Something more than pain

She is more than a name

Still never dated before

Thirty years old with no knocks on my door

Wondering if I’ll ever be heard

When listening do you absorb a word

Never made small talk or had a conversation

I don’t understand what you wish to get from me

I swear there is nothing about me that fits your description

You all seem excited by the prospect but all I want is to leave

I say that I’ve never courted a woman

I mean this sincerely so please understand

My looks were my only tool in life you see

I never needed words for they came to me

They treated me well and I wouldn’t complain

My grandfather’s genes truly flow through my veins

Long, thick blond hair perhaps not on my face

A thin Austrian figure still covers that place

I can’t and I don’t understand the concept

Reminded so constantly what I truly regret

To tell you I’ll never pursue life with others

They must come to me and only as a brother

We each are aware of what we can do

To none of us different from the other

We have always trusted in nothing undue

Through the words of a cherishing mother

We’re taught to embrace things with curious minds

And told to observe and discover ourselves

Until one day each of us reaches a time

To see patterns on dusty old shelves

As this life still is turning its people around

With each day we survive its sweet game

Each memory made could be cause to stand proud

For the turns of this world stake their claim

We hope that a demon won’t reach through the cracks

At each step we take untread before

The sure and courageous will reach through the black

Towards the light that is seen at the door

We are as beautiful as we wish ourselves to be

We are never what others see

We are the images we create of the world into which we’re hurled

The pages of this life unfurled

We are creation and destruction through choice

We are one voice

Screaming so silently to a universe unwilling

The sound it hears, the cries of killing

We find our lives in pursuit of death without care

Pleasure and amusement with passions laid bare

God’s hand cannot be found in all our ways

As he watches down from far above, counting days

Into this sweet dissidence with each other

Expecting something of reaction as a brother

Within our minds we see ourselves as gods

As slow we see each passerby and nod

Cannot our hearts awaken more to love

Untold defiance from a silent dove

Where bitterness and hatred find a source

Such tempting possibilities in course

Clear to see the days as they unravel

The miles wear the roads on which we travel

So soon we must be found in each endeavor

As we must find our way before forever

For me, there was only ever a single choice

No knowledge otherwise or skill to speak of

No music to share but cartoonish changes and dialects

You wish to tell me that I’m a tough guy

A strong man with a recklessness in passion because of my fashion

I lack not what you wish to perceive as desire

I only carry within me so deep inside that burning fire

This is not refusal through your accusations but clarity

I am not what you desire

I am me

I cannot be more than that or less

So I say there was only one and hold this meaning

For alone the stars still shine and days are gleaming